How we Conflict Matters
Team conflict that improves our work is powerful, engaging, exciting and gets the best of everyone, true collective intelligence. Team conflict that doesn't improve the work just exhausts people.
We have too much to do. We can't afford to burn energy on friction that's aimed at each other instead of focused on making the work better.
The question isn't whether we conflict. It's how.
Conflict that arises from intellectual friction (which we want) ignites us and conflict that arises from interpersonal friction (which we don't want) just burns.
Some phrases to watch out for as a sign that conflict is about to get interpersonal:
"With all due respect..." (disrespect is about to arrive)
"No offense, but..." (offense is definitely coming)
"I'm just being real/honest..." (about to be brutal, not honest)
"You always..." or "You never..." (making it about the person's character or dismissing the person before the idea)
Anything like this happening in your team? I'd love to help you map the pattern, and more importantly the patterns of success.
*High Performing Exec Team programs* *Bewteen Team programs*
*Workplace mediation* *Exec Coaching*