Jean Valjean, the angry ex-convict in Les Miserables meets Bishop Bienvenu who trusts him to stay the night. Jean Valjean breaks that trust by stealing some silver goblets and is caught the next day. The Bishop makes a second and even larger move of trust by telling the police he gave the silver to Jean. A third demonstration of trust sees the Bishop giving him further treasure, a pair of silver candlesticks. He trusts Jean Valjean to use the silver to become an honest man.
Trust is future based. It is a move based on the hope of a better future. Someone needs to demonstrate trust first; whether it is a new relationship or after a break in trust. Imagine you demonstrate trust first, in the hope of a better future. What if they don’t reciprocate, does that mean you stop trusting them, stop believing in a better future with this person? Or do you demonstrate trust a second time? How many demonstrations of trust are you willing to make without reciprocation?
Many variables will determine your answer including your history, your need, the perceived risk, your pride. You will have a bias towards trust or not to trust, a bias in your hope for a better future. Which way does your bias lead you?
Amy is an expert in communication for influence. She works with teams and leaders to get underneath the surface and change the real blocks to growth. Join Silverlinings to get tips and tools for growth and engagement at work.Click www.dramysilver.com for details of programs and download free offers.